Never Going To Be a Morning Mom
Someday I want to be the showered & put together mom that drops off my kids at daycare after a stress free morning & returns to the car to find my perfectly crafted bulletproof coffee sitting there waiting for me. It sounds lovely, doesn’t it? Especially that whole stress free morning part (and let’s be real – the showered part). However, I think I’m destined to be the haven’t showered in three days, wearing the same clothes I picked up the kids in yesterday, and didn’t have time to make my coffee at home, mom. I’m convinced that 90% of the time the reason why so many moms go to Starbucks in the morning is because we simply didn’t have time to make coffee at home that morning. It isn’t that we just have to have that vanilla latte. It’s caffeine for survival.
In our family my husband does the morning routine with the kids (he is a freaking rockstar) and I do the afternoon routine. He is the kind of person where his alarm clock goes off once and he is up and getting ready. Personally, I don’t understand people like that. I have about 15 alarms set for the morning and can’t seem to get up to any of them until my “oh crap you are late” back up alarm goes off. Lately I am either starting work at 6am or am just coming off of an overnight shift at 6am and am heading straight to bed. He gets them up and dressed and dropped off at daycare and school every morning. Meanwhile I am the one that always does pick up from school and daycare in the afternoon. It works really well for us. Every single time that I am on morning duty it is an utter disaster. In fact, in an honest moment part of the reason I tried the whole stay at home mom thing a year ago was because I was tired of mornings being so dang stressful. Spoiler alert: I am not a morning person. And neither is my oldest daughter. Together we made quite the pair when I attempted to shower & get both of us ready and out the door by 7:30am. I turned into the worst version of myself and hated the mom I became as we were rushing out the door. It just wasn’t worth it.
Today just reinforced the fact that I’m never going to be the morning mom that I want to be. On a typical day our girls are up at 6am and they are out the door by either 6:30am or 6:45am. However, today our youngest had a doctor appointment in the morning so we kept both girls home until it was time to leave for the appointment. Admittedly I was a little (okay, really) nervous about doing the whole morning thing by myself. Okay, I’ve got this! It will be easy. 7:00am rolls around… 7:15am… finally at 7:30am both girls wake up and the chaos begins. We had exactly a half an hour to go from bed to breakfast to car. Incase you are wondering, getting really picky diva three year olds ready in the morning is the worst. She wants to wear a dress every. single. day and is never happy with whatever I picked out for her to wear. Today was no different. We spent over ten minutes trying to get her to understand that she cannot wear the dress that she put on in the middle of the night to daycare. It needs to be washed. Finally when she wasn’t looking I tossed the dress up high in her closet so she couldn’t see it & somehow convinced her to get her clothes on…before she spotted a different dress that she just had to wear. Okay, fine. She won. On the dress went on top of her clothes. Then she starts pulling out the bins of clothes/shoes in her room because she just had to wear the black boots that are two sizes too small. Trying to reason with a three year old who doesn’t understand that the clothes are in the bin because they don’t fit her anymore is beyond pointless. Meanwhile while I am in a battle over dresses and shoes with one the other is completely undoing everything I just did by taking everything off! By the time we moved past the dresses and shoes we had 8 minutes to spare before getting in the car and neither of them had breakfast yet. I quick tossed waffles in the toaster and did the whole “eat a waffle in the car” breakfast routine. This used to be an everyday occurrence when I had to leave for work every morning at 7:30am and drop my oldest off at daycare. Pretty much felt like the worst mom ever. We are about to get coats on when I realize that I am still in my pajamas. Well crap. I definitely haven’t showered in who knows how long & my hair is at that awful greasy stage where you can’t even fake it if you tried. I had half of my make up left on my face & looked like a train wreck. It was one of those mornings where I just put on a bra & threw on a hoodie and called it good. I think I may have even put deodorant on but let’s be honest, that is debatable. It is now officially time to leave and somehow we got everyone in the car without a meltdown. We get to daycare and I’m standing there in the driveway telling my daughter to eat her waffle faster – which is a major contradiction to how I am always telling her to slow down and really chew her food! It was a whirlwind. I’m pretty sure my daughters doctor thinks I really am a hot mess because I think I’ve looked like that 4 out of the last 5 times we have seen her. Not even kidding.
Mom’ing is hard you guys. And I’m just never going to be the put together mom that has nice smooth mornings – ever. Even though I would love nothing more to be that mom. Maybe when my kids are all in high school and do everything themselves, including driving themselves to school, then I might have a fighting chance. But now? Absolutely not. I’m just going to embrace it and own it. So if you are like me and find yourself with greasy hair, questionable deodorant, and in the same clothes as yesterday… I’m raising a glass of wine to you. And if you are one of the put together moms that doesn’t have stressful mornings and is able to drink the coffee that you made at home that morning… I’m going to ask you who your full time nanny is. Or if you really are in fact superwoman. No matter what kind of mom you are – keep doing you, momma.
ps. Huge thank you to my daycare provider for realizing that today was a crap show & for giving me chocolate this morning. Also major thank you to my husband for being a freaking rockstar at mornings every morning so that I don’t have to even attempt them. You are amazing & we all love you. And I really, really love you for letting me sleep.